Whenever I start these articles I never really know where I’m going with them. Basically, I just plug in my headphones, listen to the saddest songs I can, and then start typing. Most of the time, I laugh at what I write and immediately delete it.
I haven’t written in awhile. I never really know what to write, and what my words will mean to others. It seems that every time I try to do good, everything around me falls into pieces. Pieces that can never be put back together. And I’ll admit it, because of that I’ve grown away from God. But the funny thing is, that he never grows away from me.
Stress. It has basically consumed me these past few weeks. Dealing with tests, death, sickness. It’s not fun. Especially when you have to do it alone. I guess I’m not really alone. I’ve always had my friends to support me, and we’ve had times just to curl up under a blanket and cry. That blanket has come to mean a lot to me. I like to joke that it’s made up of emotions, but really that’s almost what it is. A place to cry, a place for community.
But where am I going with this?
Does what I write mean something? Is it worth all this effort just to prove in the end I’m not really helping anyone?
Somehow I think it does. I don’t know who is reading this and why but there’s something I want you to know.
Your opinion matters. Whatever you have to say serves great importance to this world.
What a bold statement that is. In a world where people are repeatedly pushing others down and stripping them of their voice, we need more statements like this.
Those two sentences mean more than a couple of words with some added punctuation. Proclaiming this means you understand you have importance, you have a valued opinion and a purpose.
That’s the question it seems like everyone is asking: What is my purpose? Why am I here on this Earth?
It’s a lot like my rambling thoughts at the beginning of this article. I had no idea what I was writing, I didn’t know if this was going to end up meaning anything. However, as more and more words are typed out, I finally begin to understand where this is actually going; I understand why I’m writing this article. Though, that’s not exactly fair to say. It’s really been God writing this all along.
To be honest, I’m never really sure if we will ever know our purpose. But I can tell you one thing with one hundred percent certainty.
You have a beautiful and wonderful purpose.
I have no idea what it is, I’m not sure I can ever tell you. But you need to be willing to let God lead you through this process. Most of the time, we as humans alone make some pretty awful decisions. The little thing we almost always forget is that God is absolutely perfect and He loves us. He never wishes harm upon us or to lead us in the wrong direction.
But I don’t think we really forget about, we just choose not to think about it.
But you can’t be afraid. God already has plans for you. The scariest part about that is that no matter what we do we cannot change our future, no matter how hard we want to. No matter how we feel, we will never and have never been in control.
So why do we spend all our time dwelling on the future?
Before I ramble on any further, I’ll close this article saying that I hope you can learn to not be afraid. But courage does not come from us, it can only come from Him.
Accept the purpose He has for you. Be willing to follow through with the plans and be willing to allow yourself to lose control. Not that you had any to begin with.
But if you can remember one thing. If you can remember one sentence from all of these jumbled up words I hope it is this:
You are worth more than you can imagine. God has a great purpose for you.