You find yourself in a position you had not imagined. Not in a million years. Yea, it was going fine before. But now? You look around and take in everything wrong that’s happened, feeling your mental capacity start to crack under the pressure. Your eyes fill with tears threatening to spill over, but you keep it together. After all, you’re leaving in a couple minutes, and you don’t want anyone to think you don’t have it together. You start thinking of how things would be if you had it together, and that just digs deeper, tearing you up inside. And you ask: Why, God? Why me? Why are these things happening? Why aren’t you doing anything? Can you even do anything?
Sound familiar? Yea, me too.
I’ve actually cried those things to myself, night after night. I would curl up, shaking, and just cry. It wouldn’t even make it better. I became so overwhelmed that that was the question I decided to ask a pastor at my church: “Why does God let these things happen to be?” And, surprisingly enough, he came up with a scenario that I haven’t imagined before…
When you were little, maybe you learned to ride a bike. Now, at first, your couldn’t balance yourself. So they put some training wheels on that bike, and walked beside you, steadying you when you would normally fall. You learned the basics. But soon enough, you had to learn to balance by yourself. The training wheels came off… and you fell. Actually, you fell a lot, and your parents didn’t always catch you. But, they were still there. They encouraged you to keep going. They whispered words of encouragement, and picked you back up and set you back on that bike. And soon enough… you learned to balance by yourself.
Yes, sometimes when we get a little bit over confident, we take the gravel path. We try that jump, that trick. We try riding with no handle bars. And we fall. But you know what? We learn to get back up. We know how to balance better now, don’t we?
God sees us when we fall. And it hurts him, too. But actually, he lets some things happen to us, because he wants us to use that time to grow our faith in him. Sort of like a test, if you will. And when we use those times to make us stronger people, then eventually even the smallest things will be insignificant. That doesn’t mean we won’t fall again… it just means we will be better equipped.
So don’t stop, don’t give up hope, and keep pushing. When hard times come, and you seek Him out in the wind and the rain, you will find him there. Walking beside you, steadying you, whispering words of encouragement. You just have to look. Isaiah 40:31 says, “but those who hope in the LORD will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint.”
So remember: It’s hard right now, but it’ll be okay. You’ll be okay.
I’ve been there too.