Being lonely can be a dark place. It can sometimes feel like a void that you want to escape from. You run around, searching for an exit—a piece of light—but instead the void just continues to pull you deeper.
You crave for someone to help you. To save you. But despite all the talks, the hangouts, the time you spend outside of your house… your heart still hesitates.
You’re scared. You’ve gotten so used to loneliness, that you’re scared to be loved, even though all you feel is the craving for it. You shut down your mind, convincing yourself that feeling things is a weakness. Your days go by in a repetitive pattern, and you’re numb to the world.
It seems like there’s nothing in the world for you. But yet, there is. Despite the loneliness dragging you under, you keep searching for a hint of light. Why? Because you know. You know there’s something out there, calling to you. Calling for you.
You see it in the mountains, the sun glinting off of them at sunset. The smile of a stranger as you hold open the door for them. You hear it in the wind, the sound of it shaking the trees. The sounds of chatter and laughter echoing through the city. You feel it, when you look up at the night sky, your body tingling from the beauty of the stars and moon.
There’s so much beauty in the world. A beauty that portrays a sense of completeness… a small sense of perfection, in an imperfect world. I don’t know about you, but seeing it around me reminds me that there’s a love that exists, that is bigger than I could ever comprehend—a love that is never going to stop trying to gain my attention. And it pushes me on, making me look forward to see what part of love I’ll see today, and tomorrow, and the day after that. I found that ray of light in my dark loneliness, and I’m desperately holding onto it, hoping that it’ll one day lead me to the sun.
And I hope you find yours too.